All of a sudden, there is this a sense of excitement.

Is it settling into our new home, knowing we don't have to move again for at least another 18 months? Could it be the excitement around welcoming my little niece into this world and the joy of planning a visit to my family far away? Or is the excitement to meet up and get to know our new friends a little more?

As much as I am thrilled about the above, the reason for the excitement is much closer to home. It's this blog. The satisfaction of seeing written words. My words on this screen.

I have been on "grind" mode for so long, I have forgotten what it feels like fully to enjoy things.

There are little bubbles in my tummy and words aching to be written. I have not felt such a strong desire to do nothing but write all day and learn about this new art. Yes, I have considered that this feeling may not last for long, and that I may run out of steam at some point, yet still I am excited.

As a child, I was always getting into trouble for fiddling with things. I was the curious cat that got into everything. Barbies didn't last long with me - I wanted to see how they were made. Anything with a battery or mechanism would be torn to pieces within days of purchase. As I got older, I remember trying to piece things back together after destroying them so that my parents wouldn't notice.

In my adult years, my favourite after-work activities involves creating with my hands. Learning to cook something different or learning to sew or knit. Anything that will allow me to create.

I had never imagined that creating words on a screen would bring the same level of joy. I have been shying away from writing, and outright running away from spending more time on my computer. I don't even want to get into how terrified I am of the words that may come out.

I am once again astonished by how little I know myself. This act of writing has reignited a fire inside me that I thought had died a quick death in my teenage years.

Thanks to years of reading, listening to podcasts, chatting with so many special people, I am rediscovering what is inside me.

Biggest lesson so far - no matter where you find yourself, keep searching.

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2022-07-24

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