My mother can speak to anyone, anywhere at any time.

My siblings and I would squirm awkwardly whenever my mum would decide that she had to ask a total stranger a very random question. It did not matter where we were, the grocery store, the line at the bank or outside our school. Within a few minutes we would know intimate details about the other person - Where they lived? How many kids they had? Where they went to church? Oh, and they had an invite to dinner at our house on Thursday at 7pm (after bible study).

I could not understand her desire to chat to strangers. I mean, it’s scary to talk to strangers, right? What if they don’t like you? What if they think you’re weird? What if they don’t have time for you?

Fast forward a few years, and my significant other can also very quickly strike up conversations with strangers. He genuinely wants to know the most popular meals on the menu are and prefers recommendations when doing most things. Luckily I am older and have a little more appreciation for this unique quality. We’ve tried food we never thought we would eat — and loved it, been to places we’ve never thought we would visit (Tropical Island living), and we have more friends than I thought possible.

It seems they understand something that I did not - when you talk to strangers, you’re opening up a world of possibilities. New friends, new experiences, new perspectives. There is freedom in looking at another human and connecting with just a few sentences.

This really got be thinking. Not so much about the strangers that I feel so awkward to engage with (thankfully I have some people to help with that).

No, I mean the stranger I see when I look in the mirror.

I have moved through so many stages of life, in a relatively short space of time. From finishing school, getting married, having kids, getting divorced, going back to school, working, finding love again, moving countries - in less than 15 years. Its a mouthful! It means I have been running to keep up, but kinda lost sight of who I am.

All of a sudden, I am the stranger. I have questions for the person in the mirror, will she respond?

Am I weird? Do I like me? Do I have time for me? Where am I going? What am I trying to achieve?

How do I connect with the stranger that stares back at me with curious eyes? If connecting with other humans ignites my joy, what will happen if I figure out how to connect with myself?

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2022-07-23

on-speaking-to-strangers